I sometimes believe that my life could make a good book, with a title like "Just Because You Think You Know Where You're Going Doesn't Mean That's Where You'll End Up." Obviously I'm still working on the title, but you get my point. If someone from the future had told me my freshman year of college that this is where I would be 4 years later, I probably would have laughed at whoever it was. Where I am now is nowhere close to where I thought I would be. I don't say that with regret at all..I honestly believe I am in a better place then I could have imagined, and I feel like I could say that about a lot of experiences I've had these past 4 years. I do also secretly wish that before Jesse and I had gotten married, he would have clued me in to what an interesting and excellent adventure our lives were going to be.
God has this pretty cool way of getting you where you need to be. Fortunately for those of us who don't take the simple nudge, He also operates in knocking you over the head, trial and error, and providing your life with a neon sign that says "AMBER GO THIS WAY!" or something with your name in the lights. The road He may set you on may have trials and hardships; you might get hurt; you might have an absolute blast and see nothing but blue skies and clear sailing. Regardless of how you get there, He will get you there and you will learn the lessons needed along the way. When I first moved to Arizona, I couldn't understand why I was here. Why did I need to be so far away from my comfortable home to start a new home out here? Why couldn't Jesse and I start married life somewhere else, closer to family? What a road the first 6 months out here was..looking back, I don't regret it. How could I? The things I learned, through the laughter and tears, have made me a better person. I was thrown into the world with pretty much no life experience which made me lean more heavily on the only person I had. Jesse and I had to figure so much out on our own or through helpful (sometimes not helpful at all) phone calls with our parents. I can honestly say now that we learned so much out here and we grew so much closer then I think we would have if we had stayed somewhere comfortable. Another lesson I've learned: if you're too comfortable where you are to learn what God has in store for you, He just might move you somewhere else. i.e. move you to the desert.
I wish I could offer everyone encouragement who is going through a rough time. All I can say is hold on: God could be in the middle of working something excellent out in your life that you just can't see. Keep your eyes open, He may be getting ready to light your very own neon sign and it will all make sense.