I finally decided that since I haven't written on this blog in several months it was high time to do so. Not that I have anything super important to say, but since it's my blog, I will say it anyway.
It's really been bothering me this summer how much people complain when they have been blessed with so much. I am 100% as guilty as the next guy, don't get me wrong, but I have really been working on this because it has been driving me up the wall. Jesse and I complain and make fun of the house we live in (because really..if you heard about our winter, you will understand why we do..) but then as soon as we are done I always try and be positive and say "but I really feel fortunate that we HAVE a place to live." Which is definitely true. As annoying as it is to have paid over $300 some months for gas to heat our small house, and to still feel/see snow coming through the windows after I've put plastic over them..and to lose feeling in my feet when walking around in the kitchen too long with no slippers on, we have a place to live. Which is more than a lot of people can say right now. We have the money to pay our bills and pay them on time..so why do we complain?
Why do people complain in general? Is it so other people will feel sorry for them and say "oh yes, your life is so much worse then mine is" and so the complainer will be the center of attention? I love where I work and the people I work with..but one day as I was working, I got to listen to one of my supervisors complain for the majority of my shift about how rough things were for her right then. She was on the phone most of the time and every person she talked to got the same speech: my husband is in this hospital, so and so is in this other hospital and this other relative is in this third hospital; I have a migraine; I have so much work to get done and all I want to do is go home; I have it the worst for real (an actual phrase she said). Okay..if you're THAT busy, HANG UP THE PHONE AND GET STUFF DONE!? And I'm sorry your husband and family are in the hospital..but they're alive right?
I know it's hard sometimes to see the silver lining. Sometimes it seems the lining is seriously black and there is nothing positive to be seen for miles and years. Truth is..even when it is dark and bleak, there is still that lining. You are alive, you have your health..you're not living on the street. And honestly, if you're reading this, you have enough money for a computer, right? You're not having to pawn off your possessions to make ends meet. I've been working on this line of thinking this summer, and I think/hope I'm doing better. Yes, I may go through some rough times, but God is still by my side blessing me abundantly. And I'm sure He is right next to you too, regardless of what you're going through. That should be enough to make you smile and realize, hey, I don't have it that bad I guess..
12 August 2010
26 April 2010
God provides
God provides: a concept that we, as Christians, all know and try so hard to grasp and accept in our lives. During the high points in our life, it's so easy to point to God as the source of the goodness..but what about in the lower points? When your faith is really being tested, is it as easy to say that you trust God and know He is going to take care of you in His timing? Even if everything seems to be going well and you feel you're at a "high point" in your life, there are still the bumps along the way that test your faith in Him.
Right now, I would consider myself at a higher point in my life. It seems so many exciting things are happening and everything (for the most part) is going well. But of course, there is the Debbie Downer of money. And I hate money I have decided. With all Jesse and my trips we've been taking, our budget has been thrown completely out of whack and we've over spent in some areas and other areas (like groceries? oops) have gone neglected to try and compensate for the over spending. But, now that we're sticking around home for awhile, we're really focusing on getting back on track and having extra money at the end of the month to go towards a down payment for a house. All this to say, we're trying to be really strict with our money and only spend what we have allotted ourselves in the budget. This morning, I realized we had to pay the water bill. No big deal, I knew there was money in the bank account, so I went ahead and paid it, but when I looked at our budget, what I saw was that we put in $8 less each month then was needed to cover the total amount. I was kind of crushed because I had no idea where the extra $8 was going to come from (Don't worry, we really have enough money to cover our bills, it's just a matter of staying within some strict boundaries of a budget). So I looked in the water bill portion of the budget and there was the EXACT amount in there that we needed. The entire amount. Obviously, last month had been a little cheaper and we hadn't used the whole amount so we had some rollover, but still. The whole amount was there.
What do you do in those situations? I realized quickly that we had been billed less last month then was normal so we had a little extra, but does that mean I can just write it off as a coincidence? Probably.. and I'm sure a lot of people do. But this morning, I realized it was God taking care of us and thanked Him for His faithfulness.
I was blown away. And I'm sure this post is rambling and out of order and may not make sense, so I'm not going to proof read it. Just bear with me. The moral of the story is, God provides, even in the smallest ways we can see it and feel that He is watching out for us. The end.
Right now, I would consider myself at a higher point in my life. It seems so many exciting things are happening and everything (for the most part) is going well. But of course, there is the Debbie Downer of money. And I hate money I have decided. With all Jesse and my trips we've been taking, our budget has been thrown completely out of whack and we've over spent in some areas and other areas (like groceries? oops) have gone neglected to try and compensate for the over spending. But, now that we're sticking around home for awhile, we're really focusing on getting back on track and having extra money at the end of the month to go towards a down payment for a house. All this to say, we're trying to be really strict with our money and only spend what we have allotted ourselves in the budget. This morning, I realized we had to pay the water bill. No big deal, I knew there was money in the bank account, so I went ahead and paid it, but when I looked at our budget, what I saw was that we put in $8 less each month then was needed to cover the total amount. I was kind of crushed because I had no idea where the extra $8 was going to come from (Don't worry, we really have enough money to cover our bills, it's just a matter of staying within some strict boundaries of a budget). So I looked in the water bill portion of the budget and there was the EXACT amount in there that we needed. The entire amount. Obviously, last month had been a little cheaper and we hadn't used the whole amount so we had some rollover, but still. The whole amount was there.
What do you do in those situations? I realized quickly that we had been billed less last month then was normal so we had a little extra, but does that mean I can just write it off as a coincidence? Probably.. and I'm sure a lot of people do. But this morning, I realized it was God taking care of us and thanked Him for His faithfulness.
I was blown away. And I'm sure this post is rambling and out of order and may not make sense, so I'm not going to proof read it. Just bear with me. The moral of the story is, God provides, even in the smallest ways we can see it and feel that He is watching out for us. The end.
06 April 2010
timing
Timing is sure a funny thing. Some people just always seem to get it right and those are the people I envy. Occasionally I feel that my timing is just spot on and things fall exactly into place as God opens and closes doors to show me to where to go. Other times, I feel that it doesn't matter what in the world I do, my timing is just off.
Today, my timing was off. Literally. But it's all okay.
I had a job interview and for whatever reason, I thought it was at 1130, not 11. So obviously at 1106 when I decided to double check in my planner with who I was meeting, I had an extreme panic attack since I was obviously already late. I called the lady, explained the situation and got on the road.
What is it about timing? How come some days all the pieces just seem to fall perfectly into place and you feel like you barely have to do anything but float through life? I kind of felt like that with the two jobs I had in AZ..the first one, we were driving by a strip mall on the way to do some hiking and I saw a sign that said "now hiring" for a restaurant that was opening soon. On the way back from the hike, we stopped in so I could apply. Had an impromptu interview (yes, in sweaty hiking clothes..I leave good first impressions) and off we went. A day or so later I got a call back for a second interview and I was hired. That was sure easy..the other job, just as easy. I was working at the first job and some of the regulars came through the line so I asked what they did. Turns out, they worked at the gym right down the street from my house and the one who worked in the child center was looking for some one to hire. Done and done.
But you know what? Timing isn't really in our hands. Sure, we can control when we wake up in the morning and when you actually leave for an interview so you aren't late. However, the end result isn't in our hands. I was texting my sister and we discussed that it doesn't matter if I showed up on time today or not, I either was going to get the job or not: it was in God's hands. If I wasn't meant to get it, I wouldn't have gotten it even if I did show up on time.
The moral of the story is this: it's not in your hands. You could have the best timing in the world and still not get the job, or win the game or do something else really big. You could also have horrible timing and still win. The point is, it's not all up to you, so don't stress. Leave the timing to someone who has always had it right.
And by the way, I still think the interview went super well and I'm pretty sure she loved me. We'll see I guess..
Today, my timing was off. Literally. But it's all okay.
I had a job interview and for whatever reason, I thought it was at 1130, not 11. So obviously at 1106 when I decided to double check in my planner with who I was meeting, I had an extreme panic attack since I was obviously already late. I called the lady, explained the situation and got on the road.
What is it about timing? How come some days all the pieces just seem to fall perfectly into place and you feel like you barely have to do anything but float through life? I kind of felt like that with the two jobs I had in AZ..the first one, we were driving by a strip mall on the way to do some hiking and I saw a sign that said "now hiring" for a restaurant that was opening soon. On the way back from the hike, we stopped in so I could apply. Had an impromptu interview (yes, in sweaty hiking clothes..I leave good first impressions) and off we went. A day or so later I got a call back for a second interview and I was hired. That was sure easy..the other job, just as easy. I was working at the first job and some of the regulars came through the line so I asked what they did. Turns out, they worked at the gym right down the street from my house and the one who worked in the child center was looking for some one to hire. Done and done.
But you know what? Timing isn't really in our hands. Sure, we can control when we wake up in the morning and when you actually leave for an interview so you aren't late. However, the end result isn't in our hands. I was texting my sister and we discussed that it doesn't matter if I showed up on time today or not, I either was going to get the job or not: it was in God's hands. If I wasn't meant to get it, I wouldn't have gotten it even if I did show up on time.
The moral of the story is this: it's not in your hands. You could have the best timing in the world and still not get the job, or win the game or do something else really big. You could also have horrible timing and still win. The point is, it's not all up to you, so don't stress. Leave the timing to someone who has always had it right.
And by the way, I still think the interview went super well and I'm pretty sure she loved me. We'll see I guess..
22 March 2010
I'm sure by now, everyone who possibly reads this blog has heard about the health care bill being passed. I am certainly not going to get into my thoughts and feelings on this, except to state my stance: hate it and so frustrated that it passed through the government.
This is not a political blog, and I certainly don't know enough about politics to go into details, nor do I want to. The only reason I bring this up is because of a conversation Jesse and I had this morning.
We were discussing how frustrated we were that it passed and out of the blue he changed the topic and said "wow, I'm at peace." ...? He was reading a thread posted on a forum he follows online and at the bottom with the signature, the poster had the Bible verse Psalm 37:8a, which states: "Do not fret because of evil men.."
Wow. Not saying anyone is evil, that's just the translation, but what an appropriate time to stumble on that verse. Jesse is a worrier by nature, so for him to find this verse at that time floored him.
Things of this world don't matter. Evil/sin is going to happen; it is our job to hate the sin, love the sinner, and pray for those who do bad. We don't have to like what's going on, but it will pass along with everything else. When we become concerned with things of this world, we need to "not fret" and look towards Heaven and the end goal..where we win for all of eternity.
This is not a political blog, and I certainly don't know enough about politics to go into details, nor do I want to. The only reason I bring this up is because of a conversation Jesse and I had this morning.
We were discussing how frustrated we were that it passed and out of the blue he changed the topic and said "wow, I'm at peace." ...? He was reading a thread posted on a forum he follows online and at the bottom with the signature, the poster had the Bible verse Psalm 37:8a, which states: "Do not fret because of evil men.."
Wow. Not saying anyone is evil, that's just the translation, but what an appropriate time to stumble on that verse. Jesse is a worrier by nature, so for him to find this verse at that time floored him.
Things of this world don't matter. Evil/sin is going to happen; it is our job to hate the sin, love the sinner, and pray for those who do bad. We don't have to like what's going on, but it will pass along with everything else. When we become concerned with things of this world, we need to "not fret" and look towards Heaven and the end goal..where we win for all of eternity.
12 March 2010
dreams
Are you a dreamer? Not dreamer in the sense of the word like dreaming about the future and thinking up wonderful adventures for your life. Dreaming as in when you sleep. Obviously, science is now claiming that everyone dreams every night, and fine, whatever, that's fine and dandy, but I rarely remember said dreams.
On the occasions that I remember my dreams when I wake up, people I know have always been present, and they aren't really dreams where we go and are running away from zombies or anything. When I was minoring in psychology, I spent some time studying Freud. For the most part, I think he's full of nonsense..but there probably is some truth in the things he says. Freud was a big believer in the meaning of dreams: every dream had a meaning. So on the morning that I wake up remembering a dream, I always wonder what Freud would have said about it, normally making me laugh. However, I have had some pretty disturbing dreams..not horror quality, but more dreams about people I care about or have cared about in the past. Having one last night, I woke up pretty uneasy..what am I supposed to do with that?
The end result when I remember my dreams is that I pray for the people in them. Even if my friends look different then real life, in my dreams I know that is who they are, and there is a reason that they were in my unconsciousness. Even if I don't know what's going on in their lives..
This post really doesn't have a conclusion..I just had an unsettling dream last night and needed to write some thoughts about it.
On the occasions that I remember my dreams when I wake up, people I know have always been present, and they aren't really dreams where we go and are running away from zombies or anything. When I was minoring in psychology, I spent some time studying Freud. For the most part, I think he's full of nonsense..but there probably is some truth in the things he says. Freud was a big believer in the meaning of dreams: every dream had a meaning. So on the morning that I wake up remembering a dream, I always wonder what Freud would have said about it, normally making me laugh. However, I have had some pretty disturbing dreams..not horror quality, but more dreams about people I care about or have cared about in the past. Having one last night, I woke up pretty uneasy..what am I supposed to do with that?
The end result when I remember my dreams is that I pray for the people in them. Even if my friends look different then real life, in my dreams I know that is who they are, and there is a reason that they were in my unconsciousness. Even if I don't know what's going on in their lives..
This post really doesn't have a conclusion..I just had an unsettling dream last night and needed to write some thoughts about it.
05 March 2010
sunshine.
It amazes me how the weather can affect your mood. Minoring in psychology helped teach me some of the hows and whys, but it still continues to amaze me. Individuals who suffer from seasonal depression can tell you that during the long, cloudy and cold winters, sitting in well-lit rooms, going to a tanning bed or just sitting in front of a heat lamp will help boost their mood. Even for those who do not suffer from this depression, it's a general rule of thumb that people are more dreary and/or down if it's overcast and rainy and more upbeat and positive if the sun is shining. Yes, exceptions to every rule, there are people who love the rain and clouds and are like moles who detest the sun. But I said general, not always so I'm safe ;)
Why do such things help dictate our moods? Yesterday, the sun was shining for what seemed the first time in eons in WV. I woke up in a great mood and was sure that it would just be a great day. As the day went on, I got frustrated with one thing or another, one of which was the dog, and finally before I knew it, I was grumpy and in a horrible mood. But the sun was shining!! What's going on?
I detest being in bad moods. Especially when I am just being grumpy for no reason. Really, it seems to be a complete waste of time and incredibly selfish, both of which I detest. When I went to pick up Jesse from work, he got in the car and I gave him my warning: I'm in a bad mood. Sorry. After feeling out the situation and the severity of my bad mood, he decided to throw caution to the wind and announce that I should get over it because I was with him now. It worked, as cheesy as it sounds.
Today? The sun was shining again. I made the official decision to get over myself and move on and have a fabulous day, which I am so far. Zeke and I went for a nice walk in the sunshine and it was marvelous, even if it was a bit chilly still.
What is dictating making your day great or not?
Why do such things help dictate our moods? Yesterday, the sun was shining for what seemed the first time in eons in WV. I woke up in a great mood and was sure that it would just be a great day. As the day went on, I got frustrated with one thing or another, one of which was the dog, and finally before I knew it, I was grumpy and in a horrible mood. But the sun was shining!! What's going on?
I detest being in bad moods. Especially when I am just being grumpy for no reason. Really, it seems to be a complete waste of time and incredibly selfish, both of which I detest. When I went to pick up Jesse from work, he got in the car and I gave him my warning: I'm in a bad mood. Sorry. After feeling out the situation and the severity of my bad mood, he decided to throw caution to the wind and announce that I should get over it because I was with him now. It worked, as cheesy as it sounds.
Today? The sun was shining again. I made the official decision to get over myself and move on and have a fabulous day, which I am so far. Zeke and I went for a nice walk in the sunshine and it was marvelous, even if it was a bit chilly still.
What is dictating making your day great or not?
02 March 2010
faith, trust and pixie dust.
"Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see." Hebrews 11:1
I've been thinking about faith all day. It randomly came to me in the left over portions of a dream this morning, which was kind of weird but I rolled with it. I have no idea what this dream was about at all, but I woke up out of it to go to the bathroom and as I stumbled towards the correct room I heard my friend saying "all it takes is faith..just as much as a mustard seed." At 5:30am this floored me. So profound! My thought was something equally profound of "well yah! Of course!" followed by "what is faith?" which wasn't something I wanted to really be thinking about so early when I still had another hour at least of sleep.
The Faith chapter of Hebrews is one of my favorites: I just love it. You can go through that chapter and single out individual Biblical heroes and see how awesome they are because they trusted God, completely and wholly.
By Faith..Noah built an ark.
By Faith..Abraham left everything AND procreated well past his prime.
By Faith..Abraham offered his only son
How would my name fit in there? "By Faith, Amber.." I feel that through some specific moments in my life, I have taken the step of faith and followed God even though I had no idea what was going on. But these are not daily moments. I play it safe most times, as I'm sure most people do. What if everyone just started trusting God more? Putting 100% of their faith in Him? It doesn't take much..just the faith the size of a mustard seed.
That's really not much..But according to the Bible, that's all it takes.
Faith is hard. Not just the general and lazy "oh sure, I trust God to take care of me" but the real stuff..the faith it takes to step out on a limb and do something that seems ridiculous. Noah built a boat..when he lived in a desert. They didn't know what a flood was, but God said "do it" and Noah did. Am I that willing?
I've been thinking about faith all day. It randomly came to me in the left over portions of a dream this morning, which was kind of weird but I rolled with it. I have no idea what this dream was about at all, but I woke up out of it to go to the bathroom and as I stumbled towards the correct room I heard my friend saying "all it takes is faith..just as much as a mustard seed." At 5:30am this floored me. So profound! My thought was something equally profound of "well yah! Of course!" followed by "what is faith?" which wasn't something I wanted to really be thinking about so early when I still had another hour at least of sleep.
The Faith chapter of Hebrews is one of my favorites: I just love it. You can go through that chapter and single out individual Biblical heroes and see how awesome they are because they trusted God, completely and wholly.
By Faith..Noah built an ark.
By Faith..Abraham left everything AND procreated well past his prime.
By Faith..Abraham offered his only son
How would my name fit in there? "By Faith, Amber.." I feel that through some specific moments in my life, I have taken the step of faith and followed God even though I had no idea what was going on. But these are not daily moments. I play it safe most times, as I'm sure most people do. What if everyone just started trusting God more? Putting 100% of their faith in Him? It doesn't take much..just the faith the size of a mustard seed.
That's really not much..But according to the Bible, that's all it takes.
Faith is hard. Not just the general and lazy "oh sure, I trust God to take care of me" but the real stuff..the faith it takes to step out on a limb and do something that seems ridiculous. Noah built a boat..when he lived in a desert. They didn't know what a flood was, but God said "do it" and Noah did. Am I that willing?
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